HERNONYMOUS PERSONAL STORY

Hey guys I’d like to tell us all the most traumatic and depressing experience ever with ibs, I’m a teenager in Nigeria and well most people don’t know of such a thing called ibs damn I didn’t even know about it myself until 20 minutes ago, I always thought I was weird or the odd one out, I can assure y’all that I’m the last person to eat a lot in fact my subconscious self already realized this and I always eat so little the first episode I had was when I went to my mums workplace as a kid I was about 8 at the time, I needed to use a toilet but hey! In Nigeria it’s pretty inappropriate and abnormal for a lady to be caught talking about something distasteful in public so unfortunately I couldn’t say a word to my mum by the time I rushed down to the toilet I had shitted myself already lucky me at the time there was no one around, the next time it would happen was in boarding school I was sick at the time and delirious,it happened during a compulsory night class at first I had wanted to go back to the hostel cause I was feeling uneasy but it was dark and bushy and scary so I ran back to class cause hey I was pretty sure I could hold it till after night class(it did teach me a important lesson though I lost my fear of the dark and unknown after this experience) and then just as I was about to leave the class a senior came to take the roll call (military school you get the drill) yep I shitted myself everyone knew and I rushed to the hostel to clean myself up till today whenever an old school mate of mine sees me they remember that bitter experience and laugh then share it with others… It hurts a lot… I’m very suicidal and I’ve got a lot of mental disorders but I try to keep them to myself I’ve also got severe anxiety and I’m basically always anxious whenever I find someone new and we’re starting to relate to each other I get paranoid thinking they’ve found out and stuffs I hate myself and I’ve been contemplating suicide even more recently I’m also anorexic.. Thing is everyone laughs at me and stuffs, I feel uncomfortable whenever I hear loud laughter I’m always insecure and stuffs and I can’t even say nothing whenever people ask why I’m so suicidal and always depressed cause they wouldn’t understand and most people here are snakes they’d bite you behind your back tell others and have a good laugh so what’s the use ibs isn’t a joke guys I’ve been through the most painful experiences damn I even had one episode recently its harder when you’re in a country where no one understands you and everyone pretends to be holier than thou and stuffs

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